I am beside myself, I keep hearing myself saying "I don't know what to think."
How am I feeling? Bewildered, uncertain, insecure, ashamed, inspired, hopeful, cautious, very cautious, and angry. How are you feeling?
In the boutique we are reorganizing in conjunction with redecorating.
This is a significant process. Firstly, I need help with everything these days. EVERYthing. I am asking and receiving all day every day and feeling so blessed to have support and collaboration in my life. It's never been so necessary for me as it is now and it's lovely and challenging and humbling and fascinating. I'm noticing what shows up when there's a need to be met.
Secondly, we are looking at every single thing we own, what we use, don't use, needs vs. wants, prioritizing, optimizing, and at the same time considering how we use them and when, why. What needs improving, no longer serves. What will continue, what's changing, oh besides EVERYTHING. WOAH. It's a deep dive, and while the nation is doing the exact same thing, all amidst a pandemic.
It's not pretty, it's very uncomfortable, there are so many moving parts and things don't fit perfectly into categories. They don't fit perfectly in their boxes or the space allotted for them.
Angels show up. Puzzle pieces fall into place and there is laughter or tears at just the moment energy needs to shift or move. We're considering boarding up our windows, we're thinking what's our beautiful message we will write in place of this protective stance.
I feel threatened. I feel creative. I feel confident.
The layers upon layers of this cake are intense and imploding in places, delicious in others.
My hope is that I can trust that this is necessary for the higher good, that there are lessons and nuggets of truth and goodness that are required for us to love more easily.
I have attempted to share some information I thought was interesting: giving voice to what others were putting out there, and in doing so hurt and offended a dear friend whose heart I hold close to my own. Now my heart is broken. I have to be courageous and continue to show up. I've seen some incredible artwork and wonder the role it plays in our healing, story telling, processing... People are sharing their thoughts and feelings. It's a time for listening and holding space and learning from that experience.
I am looking beneath what is being said and seeing so many feelings, expressed or not, and I'm wishing Mr. Rogers was able to speak to us all now.
Won't you be my neighbor?
We all have a place in this community, conversation. I am curious how every person can feel more loved and supported?
My mantra: perfect doesn't live here but grace does.
xoxo, Cecelia
Ps. Because I love what I do and need to make a living, I'm still talking about the earring club:)
I really appreciate so many of you joining me.
It's a beautiful thing sending personalized gifts each month. Thank you for the opportunity.
Pps. my weekly email is now going out Thursdays, and I hope that works well for you. I'm open to shifting, let me know your preference!
